Have you ever wondered how two people can experience similar circumstances and reach drastically different conclusions? I recently read an interview with Jen Hatmaker. If you aren’t familiar with Hatmaker, she has been a Christian writer and speaker for most of her adult life. She was a pastor’s wife, and about five years ago walked…
Several years ago, I wrote An Open Letter to Lysa TerKeurst when she announced her pending divorce from her husband of nearly 30 years following his adultery. Since that time, TerKeurst has gone through reconciliation attempts, cancer, divorce, and remarriage. This morning, I read an article from a question and answer session with TerKeurst as…
Fifteen years ago, the pain of adultery was overwhelming me. I couldn’t understand how my perfect life as pastor’s wife and stay-at-home mom had come crashing down around me…especially in light of my years of faithfully serving God and proclaiming His goodness. As the years have passed, I have seen the faithfulness of my Father…
Have you ever had a crisis of faith? If you don’t know what I am talking about, it’s a phrase I learned from Henry Blackaby’s Experiencing God. If you have never done this Bible study, I highly recommend it! Christians experience a crisis of faith when they sense God telling them to do something and they…
Throughout my years of writing about divorce, I have advocated for men and women who have found themselves in toxic and destructive marriages. Since I write from a Christian perspective, I often find people holding to the sanctity of marriage. I have no problem with that. I am a firm believer in one man, one…
“Are you truly happy?” That was the question posed to me earlier this week in a conversation with a friend facing divorce after a decades-long marriage. It’s the fear of the unknown that creates so much anxiety, even when the marriage was unbelievably difficult, fraught with betrayal and pain of the deepest kind. Will I…
Someone asked me this week how I ended up remarried after divorce in light of biblical teachings. My response started with Deuteronomy 24 where Moses specifically allowed divorce so that women could remarry. I went on to Malachi 2 where God talks about the cruelty of men to their wives which ultimately leads to divorce, another time…
I was confronted again this week: Why do you continue to write about divorce? Why do you allow your past divorce to color your world today? Why do you allow what your ex-husband did to you to continue to affect your relationships today? I’ve heard it many, many times. I need to leave the adultery,…
Search the internet for the top causes of divorce and you will undoubtedly find financial issues in almost every list. It’s often stated that financial issues are the number one reason for divorce. Can I be honest? I don’t think finances are the cause of divorce. I think finances are a symptom of the bigger…
It’s a question I am asked frequently: Should I stay in my marriage? It’s also a question I wrestled with for a very long time after I discovered my first husband’s infidelity. I had made a covenant before God and man, and it wasn’t something I took lightly. I had always been taught that scripture…
He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. 2 Corinthians 1:4 It’s now been 11 years since my divorce, and closer to 14 years since the entire mess began. Hard to believe…
Gary Thomas has become one of my favorite authors and marriage mentors. There was a time when I didn’t feel this way, mostly because his book Sacred Marriage was used as a weapon to tell me I should have stayed in my marriage. While I agree that marriage is sacred and divorce should never be…