“Are you truly happy?” That was the question posed to me earlier this week in a conversation with a friend facing divorce after a decades-long marriage. It’s the fear of the unknown that creates so much anxiety, even when the marriage was unbelievably difficult, fraught with betrayal and pain of the deepest kind. Will I…
Dear spouse, I want you to know how much I love you and how much I want to see God work in our lives and in our relationship. When I married you, I made a covenant before God and man–a covenant of until death do we part. And my heart has not changed. However, you…
Gary Thomas has become one of my favorite authors and marriage mentors. There was a time when I didn’t feel this way, mostly because his book Sacred Marriage was used as a weapon to tell me I should have stayed in my marriage. While I agree that marriage is sacred and divorce should never be…
On New Year’s Eve, Lysa TerKeurst, founder of Proverbs 31 ministries, announced her marriage is ending after nearly 30 years. It’s been several years since she made a similar announcement and I penned the following words to her. You see, in 2017 she announced her husband had been unfaithful and she was pursuing a legal…
One size does not fit all. I recently republished a post about purity. In it, I mentioned the book Every Young Man’s Battle. A reader asked me to do some research and look into the damage this book has done to marriages and families, and she put a link to a video by Sheila Wray…
As I sat through the funeral service, I couldn’t concentrate on the words being spoken. I kept hearing a still, small voice in my head. “Extend forgiveness,” the voice urged. It was my first time back in this church building since my husband had resigned his position as pastor of the congregation nearly five months…
The more I talk with people who have walked the dark path of adultery, the more I realize not all affairs are the same. I have a dear friend who walked the dark, painful days of adultery with me. Her husband had been a pastor at a local church when he had an affair. Through…
Sometimes I feel like a broken record. I recently read a Facebook post in a Christian group. The author was asking a question about how and when to explain to the kids the reasons behind the divorce, namely adultery. Most of the comments—whether right or wrong—were kind and gracious. Until that one person had to…
Have you heard the term “sanctity of marriage?” I typically hear this phrase thrown around to say that marriage should be protected at all costs, that divorce is never an option, that a Christian couple should never throw in the towel under any circumstances. I’m not sure, however, that is the proper use of the…
Truthfully, you can set all the boundaries you want. You can create all the rules you want. But there’s only one thing that can truly affair-proof your marriage
Many churches seem to welcome charismatic leaders who have moral faults.
I used to believe my husband’s affair was the worst thing that ever happened to me. Today, I am eternally grateful for it.